Zoomed up in my car to Scotty Land.
Oh boy I was bursting with pride
To pick up the lassies a-waiting
“Hop in! Let’s get going!” I cried.
But the lassies were back seat driving
As I drove pressing paws on the tooters.
"Laddie slow down! I’m loosing my crown
And the sniffs pass too fast for our snooters.”
As I swerved and screeched down the roadies
Just Martha, to Bailey, cried
“Och Eric! Look out for Miss Myrna!
Take care! Don’t knock her aside.”
“Eric no speeding! Say’s forty!
And One’s in need of a play with one's toys.
Can you stop at the nearest pet shop?
"I’ll pick up a sheep. And some boys.”
“Does Royalty have to halt here?”
Bailey barked as I stopped at the lights.
Thank dogness both lasses fell silent
At the sight of a doggie in tights.
“Och Aye! Hoots Toots! Can you ken it?
Nephew Petey!” Martha yapped in surprise.
I replied “Who would wagging believe it?
Ain't that a real sight for sore eyes!!”
I drove my car facing backwards. Tee. Heee!!
For a dare and a bit of a thrill.
“Eric do stop! One's hearts all a-plop.
We're both feeling decidedly ill.”
As I screeched. And braked. Turned wheelies.
Gave my zoomer a bit of a spin.
Those lassies yapped out “Och laddie!
Can we stop at a pub for a gin?”
Tired Bailey now said "Eric Home. Need my Bed!"
“No zooming!! And I'll dub you an Earl.
As if. This foxies hard wired.
But that Bailey. Ain't she quite some girl?
Haa, haaa!! Bailey must of forgotten I've already got me a title. Yonks and yonks ago. Most appropriate.
 | My Peculiar Aristocratic Title is: Most Noble and Honourable Eric the Radiant of Piddletrenthide on the Carpet Get your Peculiar Aristocratic Title |
Oopsie so yonks ago it's no longer there. But you can buy a real genuine one here !!! Only £14.99. Billy bargain eh? Have a looksie. In the meantime might be over to give you the drive of your life in the old zoomer. (For auto buffs it's a 1959 Triumph TR3A). Seeya. Sometime. Soonest. Keep 'em peeled for me. Toot Toot!
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