Sunday, 21 June 2009

EXPLORING THE WORLD OF WORK. EPISODE 1

Hello everybloggie. Been doing a spot of brain drain. Pondering now I'm into my triple troubles I ought to spread them out a bit. Share them terrierbles of mine with the working world. So. Decided. Try my paw at a series of jobs. Smart move for Eric eh? ( Maybe I'll start a series too. Keep your mince pies out for more episodes). But first up.This one. Eric The Vet. Here's a couple of likely victims. Oooops. Scrub that. Patients.



Kittie bro the one on the left did I hear you bark? Tee,heee!!! Easy mistake. They do look remarkably similar. Troughing away in their matching greys. Mr Piggy was donated to Square Dog Vet Surgery by a kind neighbour. Who hasn't a clue what my toothy pegs can do. After a quick eyeball I took Mr Piggy to my operating area. To remove his annoying snorter. That's when my scrub nurse left the room for a nano of a second. And returned to find major surgery almost completed.



Mr Piggy's vitals. Extracted.



His stupid oinker. Along with a string of porker sausages. Several swabs. Half a pound of streaky bacon. A pork pie. And varied ouch sharpie shockingly nasty bits and pieces. Skilfull and exacting extracting eh? With minimal evasion. AND sleight of jaw invasion. By removing one ear only!!!! No other other surgery incisions at all!!! Yep. The worlds first Key Hole Lug'ole surgery.
My very own LIP O SUCTION!!!!!! HAAAAAAAAA!!!!! Hmmm. Got me thinking. Perhaps my sweet friend Miss Flakie Lakie would like me to Lipo her big rear...I mean her ear'ole. What do you think I'd find? Okeydokey. Let's give it a whirl. Remove her ear first. Apply my Eric LIP O SUCTION (patent pending)



Oooooooo. Lacie !!! Lots of Little Black Dating books!!! Chapsticks!!! Holey Moley. Dogtox!!!! Fur Dye!! And finally. "Ateenyweenyyellowpolkadotbikini. Thatshecan'tfitintotoday". Ooooh haaaaaa!!!! What a hoot.I'll do another. Try that ole Key Hole Lug'ole surgery on best pal Petey. Ear'ole off ....quick LIP O and whathavewegothere?



Uh. Huh. As I thought. Chocka Blocka. Full of balls. Then everything came up Rosies!!! Weyhey!!! Isn't that wagging everybloggie? Specially after the sad disappointment Rosie and Petey had lately. (Rosie's leggededs too. Been thinking of them. Bet you have too.) Now. Gotta dash. Spread my terrierbles. And check on Mr Piggy in the recovery ward.



Yep. All's fine and dandy. Looksee how quickly Piggies back up on his trotters. Think I've got me a promising future everybloggie? As a PIE ON EAR IN VETERINARY SURGEON?

30 comments:

Gus said...

Ummm...I think I will stay on this side of the pond, thank you. But Teka could use a couple of nips and tucks when you have time.


gussie d

Mango said...

I am impressed with your skills in the surgical suite. Amazing what came out of Lacie's butt. Maybe you could try that lipo on my RH brother (although I suspect all you would get is rocks).

Kisses,
Dexter

Joe Stains said...

I would be more than happy to offer Tanner up for any kind of experimental surgery you can dream up!!

Scruffy, Lacie and Stanley's Place said...

Dear Eric,

I would hearby enjoy informing you that I am bringing a slander suit against your foxie highness for announcing to the entire blogosphere that I have a large caboose and then having the nerve TO SHOW THE RESULTS...

Have you never heard of HIPPA???...oh stop laughing...no pun intented...that's what our Privacy Act is called overhere...it has NUTHIN' to do with my backside.

You will be hearing from my rich attorney Scruffy..well, he's actually still a law student. He um has failed his boards at least 12 times.

Do you think you could do a little lift on my eyes and perhaps some augmentation in a few certain areas???

Love and kisses, I suppose...

Laciegirliebeastie

Pee ess...so that's where all the chap stick went...

Scruffy, Lacie and Stanley's Place said...

Yo Eric...

Um..since I don't know a whole lot about the law, maybe it might be a good idea for you to take a small trip...

Maybe we should pop over to Monte Carlo for a couple of days...Lacie will forget 'bout everything by then....or she'll come with us to pick up guys....whatever...

Barkin' at ya...

Scruffy

Pee ess...

That post was TOTALLY HYSTERICAL....!!!!!!!!!

Petey said...

What's that? You'll have to speak louder - as I can't 'EAR you all that well with just one ear left!

I have the same piggy, only mine is pink. (Perhaps yours is older, hence the gray hair on his chinny chin chin.) I preferred to de-tail the porker for his extraction. Much cleaner surgery. AND HE CAN STILL HEAR and WEAR HATS!

Jake and I are on our way to London. Meet us at Heathrow in your zoomer and then we're off to catch the Royal Highlander.

Your now deaf but noticeably lighter pal,
Petey

Sharon said...

I don't know for sure Eric, but I think you'd better scratch "vet" off your list of future occupations! I'm sure going to remember NOT to go to a vet named "Eric"...no offense!
your pal,
Bruce the cat
p.s. Pickles the cat got in trouble again today...you'll have to check out sharon's blog tomorrow to find out what he did this time! She won't be posting until tomorrow USA east coast morning time.
http://sharonissharing.blogspot.com/

TwoSpecialWires said...

Mom's laughing. But we are confused. Fergi keeps wondering what would've happened if you'd been her vet-man when she had her recent boobectomy. She's glad that she came out from all of that surgery with no more missing than the one boobie. And our Nina-Girl's been thinking about what you mighta sucked out when she had her recent wisdom tooth extraction. Me? I'm holding on tight and keeping a close watch on all my body parts. I don't want to loose any strategic parts. You've got me concerned. And you say you have credentials???

Jake

(I'm off to go find out about Rosie's people. That's got me worried, too.)

Lorenza said...

Hi, Eric!
I am sure you could do a good lipo to my mom's butt!
You did a pawesome job!
Kisses and hugs
Lorenza

Momo and Pinot said...

Eric, you're very talented whatever you want to do!

Momo & Pinot

Noah the Airedale said...

G'day Eric mate
Hmmm think I'll send Lucy over to ya. She could do with some destuffing.

Noah x

Tee said...

Oh em ... we like to stay au-natural thank you very much ....

Licks and wags

Tuffy and the Dog Woods Pack

Martha Basset said...

Hi Eric
Are you sure you have the right skills to become a vet Eric?
We were impressed with your liposuctions skills and perhaps you could become cosmetic surgeon vet to the celebrity dogs.
What about a face lift for Hooch - or perhaps Lassie could be needing some work - after all she will be a good age now!
The other career where you might excell is as stuffie tester!
Our mum just laughed at your post - poor Petey - what have you done to him?
love and kisses
Martha & Bailey xxx

Agatha and Archie said...

Wow,we are FLABBERGASTED at your technique...really QUITE AMAZING..all through ONE LITTLE PIGGIE EAR....Archie as we speak is calling the Boston Globe, I have an interview set up for you with CNN and then you are going to speak at the National Vets Conference( location TBA) Geesh this is amazing..Love A+A

Maggie and Mitch said...

I think we need to hear about episode 2! We're not so sure you were cut out to be a vet, Eric - no offense, of course!

Love ya lots,
Maggie and Mitch

Dewey Dewster said...

Eric...

I tell ya even though ya don't chase little vermin...ya kill those stuffies ta bits....why yer heartless ta 'em fer sure.....don't ya even like ta have 'em fer an overnight stay?????

I think ya have found yer profession there as a surgeon....why ya can de-stuff all yer friends and then have yer Mom take 'em ta the taxidermist ta preserve fer posterity....although all the fun is gone when they can torment ya anymore....

Dewey Dewster here....

Bruce said...

Oops...I did something really silly...I just realized that when I posted my comment, I was actually posting as Sharon instead of Bruce the cat! I guess it must have been past my bedtime or maybe I'm just having an identity crisis! Anyway...the truth is that sometimes I just forget who I really am! Glad you visited Pickles (Otis's brother in America) and I will try to keep my identities straight from now on!
your cat pal,
Bruce:)

NORWOOD UNLEASHED said...

Hi Eric
I thought your surgical procedure was masterful! What an amazing entry point... the ear. I'm wonder what you use to unstuff? Your snooter or the toothy pegs of yours.

I had a bit unstuffing lately myself. You asked why every bloggie hoped I felt better soon? Well I had a bit of a mishap. I had good dog 201 class requiring me to inhale large quantities of training treats (aka hot dogs) to enhance my "learning". I get so over heated learning all these stays and spins, mom take s me to the park for a swim with my frog friends to cool off. Then out of no where, Zoey came running by. So I had to dazzle her with my dashing mr b moves. I dashed left right and his huge circles. Then I swam out to the middle of the pond and back. Well all the Mr B moves made me sick... hot dogs came out all orifices. I was dizzy sick for the rest of the day. Can you believe it? Sick from having too much fun?

Norwood

magiceye said...

hey eric you sure are a fun guy! would love to have you on board at Pet Pride a fun meme for pets from all over the world! it begins every sunday and runs through the week, every week!
hope to catch you there!

bozo

happy said...

You have great potential, Eric. Hehe...

Toffee said...

Sorry...my mind wandered at the mere mention of pork pie...mmmm....mom was chuckling at the rest of your blog entry though...

do you think that you could bring some of that "lip action" over here?

xo

Lucia said...

Ciao bello Dottore Eric!

Hmmm ... do you need a surgical nurse?? I, Lucia, am an apprentice de-stuffer of stuffies and would love to assist you if you ever find you have need for such a thing.

BTW, la mia ragazza is on the floor screaming with laughter over your postie ... that hoomans find serious topics like surgery amusing is just too, too much for me to comprehend. Santo fumo...!

Tanti baci, Dottore!
Lucia

umekotyan said...

Good evening eric
It is appearance of the surgeon.
Here, the process to mechanization seems to be early.
Transformer and . ..doing.. :D
Irresponsible ume tyan will surely be said so.
Bowl bowl.
When it is good at thing that I crush.

The remodeling technology receives and the animated cartoon culture of Japan of good is influencing me.
hahaha

from loved ume tyan

NORWOOD UNLEASHED said...

Hi Eric
Curtains! on my lil playhouse! Oh no. My life is an open book! All are welcome to watch and play with me. Not about mom and her blogging absences. I think she may work for wine or food. First start it simple. She sits at the computer. Click and treat. She then has to string a few things together. Sit at computer, read blogs. Click Treat! Then add typing a post! Which deserves something bigger like hmmm a piece of chocolate cake. That may do the trick.

Norwood

William Tell said...

Well, My Boy was reading over my shoulder and laughed and told me that if I volunteered for the Lip'O surgery they'd find nothing at all in my ear. I beg to differ. I have things in my noggin. If I shake it hard enough, it rattles in there. Who is he kidding?

Happy Tails,
William Tell

Sally said...

Wow, Eric - that is some precision keyhole surgery - going through the ear is a pretty interesting technique. D says i could do with some Lipo - but not sure - I prefer the rolly polly look

Keep up the good work - lots of licks
Sally and Paddy

tula said...

E- your DVM surgerical skills are masterful. howevah, i hope i will not need your services anytime soon. post-op seems to hang your dirty laundry out therah. not to mention -leave you with only one ear. maybe another time..

lots of kisses,
tula

Chef said...

Eric, your surgical skills are amazing. I bet an Xray would show untold whatnots in my tummy, like sticks, rocks, chunks of rubber balls, hockey stick tape ... Well, if I ever need to have a suction done, you're the one I'll call.

I have to tell Mama I'm serious here because she's still laughing at your post. She thinks you're funny; I think you're just brilliant!

xox
Chef

tula said...

Hey eric- i tagged you. stop by. (not sure if you've been tagged already)- sure your 6th folder is something to see!

tula

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